Tuesday, September 18, 2012

I feel like things are starting to catch up with me. Like I'm on the verge of breaking. So much has been going on over the last weeks - lots of it health issues with family members. Usually I'm pretty easy going and pretty good at rolling with it all, but now with being back at work again and ridiculously busy, with issues coming up with clients, as well as the death of a baby whose birth I attended... well, like I said, it's catching up. I'm so tired. I feel drained. I feel stressed. And I'm only two weeks in. I forgot how busy things are when on placement. In the summer, I kept telling myself that it would be better come September, working with only one midwife instead of two. But so far, the workload hasn't seemed to change. I'm still putting in crazy long days. I get home and have a two or three free hours, with which I don't feel like doing anything but sitting on the couch before going to bed and doing it all again the next day. Add in a birth or two and a few meetings in a week, and all the appointments and other work get pushed back, and there goes my "protected study time". When am I supposed to get homework done on top of it all? How on earth do women with families do this? My to do list...
(order ultrasound for so-and-so
write consult letter for this person
sterilize those instruments from that birth last week
review those charts
look at lab results
follow up on lab results
call in that prescription
restock my bag
find info on this topic
research that condition
find answer to this question)
... is never ending and just seems to get longer and longer and most of it keeps getting pushed to tomorrow, and I feel like I never get on top of it. And none of my September women are having their babies, so soon there's going to be a baby storm as October people are also coming into dates, and then I'll be in postpartum hell. I wish I had more time to spend with my mom. I wish I had time to drop in and visit Grandma.

Sigh. Sorry for the rant. I'm done now.


Blogger Sophie said...

Jill, life can get pretty full sometimes, and often does get in the way of the important things (or at the least the important things in our lives). I'll be thinking of you and do hope you find some time to just be, to think, reflect and be with family.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hang in there Jill! You can tell by the words you write that you care about your work and you are so good at what you do! I'm sure your Mom knows you would like to spend more time, and your Grandma knows you would like to drop in!I will be praying for you, and your next coming weeks, that you will find peace and rest in the busyness.
Be encouraged! You are where God wants you!
Love aunt Sherri

Blogger Jill said...

Thanks Sophie and Aunt Sherri for your encouraging words.


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