Tuesday, September 18, 2012

I feel like things are starting to catch up with me. Like I'm on the verge of breaking. So much has been going on over the last weeks - lots of it health issues with family members. Usually I'm pretty easy going and pretty good at rolling with it all, but now with being back at work again and ridiculously busy, with issues coming up with clients, as well as the death of a baby whose birth I attended... well, like I said, it's catching up. I'm so tired. I feel drained. I feel stressed. And I'm only two weeks in. I forgot how busy things are when on placement. In the summer, I kept telling myself that it would be better come September, working with only one midwife instead of two. But so far, the workload hasn't seemed to change. I'm still putting in crazy long days. I get home and have a two or three free hours, with which I don't feel like doing anything but sitting on the couch before going to bed and doing it all again the next day. Add in a birth or two and a few meetings in a week, and all the appointments and other work get pushed back, and there goes my "protected study time". When am I supposed to get homework done on top of it all? How on earth do women with families do this? My to do list...
(order ultrasound for so-and-so
write consult letter for this person
sterilize those instruments from that birth last week
review those charts
look at lab results
follow up on lab results
call in that prescription
restock my bag
find info on this topic
research that condition
find answer to this question)
... is never ending and just seems to get longer and longer and most of it keeps getting pushed to tomorrow, and I feel like I never get on top of it. And none of my September women are having their babies, so soon there's going to be a baby storm as October people are also coming into dates, and then I'll be in postpartum hell. I wish I had more time to spend with my mom. I wish I had time to drop in and visit Grandma.

Sigh. Sorry for the rant. I'm done now.

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Sometimes I see people leaving my house who I've never met before. In fact, I've only ever met one of the other people who lives here. It's strange that we don't see more of each other.